In loving memory of our Little Lady Lefkowitz
Posted in At Home on 10/18/2009 01:00 am by MelissaThis entry is a break from the norm, as it’s about an issue at home in Teaneck, NJ. Our family’s dog, Lady, died on Friday, October 16th at 5 PM in our home. She had just been diagnosed with lung cancer the day before. She was 10 years, 4 months, and 12 days old.
My last entry is now grotestque in light of this debilitating news, and I’m inclined to delete it. But I won’t. I think it’s important to recognize the stark juxtaposition between a dog’s role in the States and in certain places in China. But, everyone should know that there are plenty of dog owners in China who would never think about eating dog.
Enough about that. Here’s this: the news of Lady’s death jarred me so much that I could barely leave my room today. It’s been really hard to cope with Lady’s death from out here – I wish I could be home to touch one of her dog hairs or wash her food bowl for the last time. Thankfully, the family will wait for me before we spread her ashes at her favorite park.
In order to commemorate her life, I thought it would be a good idea if the readers of this blog could post a comment about their favorite Lady moment. Lady wasn’t only a part of the Lefkowitz family, she was a part of our extended friends’ and families’ lives as well, and I know that she will be remembered by everyone as a loving, warm, silly, nudgy, attention-seeking, beautiful, playful, energetic, and all around wonderful dog.
I think my favorite memories of Lady are those from this past spring. I didn’t have class until the afternoon, so I was able to sleep in later than the rest of the family. As everyone was getting up and ready to go at around 7:30 am, Lady would come to my room and paw on the door. I’d always get up and let her in, and then we’d sleep a few more hours together before I had to start my day. I was also writing my thesis during this time and I needed a lot of breaks to get through some of the longer chapters. So every day or so, Lady and I would go on an extended walk around the neighborhood. The walks were very therapeutic for me and I would always thank Lady for keeping me company during the super stressful moments.
For Lady though, I’m sure that her favorite moments were those spent at the reservoir, running in front of us - always waiting when we were out of eyeshot – off of the leash, taking a swim, and meeting other dogs.
Beyond all the fun though, Lady was serious about doing her part in the house. In exchange for food and shelter, Lady gave us unremitting love and her guard services. She was always there to accompany us while we engaged in the lonelier activities of the day, aka making a sandwich, watching TV, taking a nap. Moreover, she kept our house “safe,” in her terms, of course: newcomers and mailmen were always given their due welcome from the living room window, and a mouse seems to have kept himself in check for over a year (my mom saw him ages ago and no one believed her – he popped out right after my dad moved Lady out of the house).
So those are some of my memories and comments on Lady. Please write down your favorite memory. I’m sure it’ll help us all fill the void that is left in her wake.
Maddy and Lady at the reservoir in 2005
Going for a swim in 2005
Her favorite position
Sporting Maddy's teddy
Jay and Lady in 2006
Chilling under the carpet
In August 2009
Our perennial puppy
Fun in the sun and the mud in October 2009
10/18/2009 at 1:28 am
My favorite memories of Lady are of going to the reservoir and watching her run around and swim (even though mel and joe didn’t want her to). She was so brave and adventurous next to Rufus who didn’t want anything to do with the water. She was so happy to just run around without a leash on. I also just remember how loving she was, and much she loved being pet and wouldn’t let you stop once you started. The last time I saw Lady was before you left for China Mel, and we took her for a walk around the neighborhood. I think that this walk, like you talked about with your thesis, was therapeutic too and helped calm your nerves before beginning this amazing adventure in China! I love you Lady and I’ll miss you!
10/18/2009 at 1:51 am
i don’t have just one favorite memory of lady, cause every memory i had with her was my favorite.
10/18/2009 at 2:12 am
Very theta post, Melis, and also wonderful pix that you posted. Lady was a very mellow being. She knew she was a calming influence on the family and was happy being a family member. She took everything in stride and knew her worth and value in the group. She did know she was sick, though, awhile ago actually…and she was ok with it. Not hysterical or feeling she had left anything undone in her life.
When we were all over at your house before you left for China, I walked in the front door and she immediately “told” me with a mental picture that she had cancer, she thought it was all over her body. (She thought the stiffness in her limbs was part of it.) I was pretty upset but said nothing till Juliet later came over to me and said that she got from Lady that she was very ill with cancer. Neither Juliet or I are particularly “psychic” in this regard but because we both got the same thought, we decided not to negate it. I petted Lady a lot and told her she had been a wonderful dog, everything a pet should be, etc. And when I stopped petting her she bumped my hand with her nose so that I would continue. We didn’t want to be all “doom and gloom” but we did tell your parents what we felt was going on.
No, don’t delete your last post. Ironic, though, isn’t it?
I think Lady would want you guys not to grieve too long but to get a new puppy that wants to be part of your family. It would please her to see you all get back to a normal, rambunctious life. I am sure she left content, knowing that she did the best job she could as a family member, and that she was much loved.
10/18/2009 at 2:12 am
My favorite moment with Lady was the first time I saw her. I was away at sleep away camp, and on the way home after camp was over everyone was acting weird in the car. I was 12, and obviously so was Melissa. Jay was 5, and kept blabbering about dogs. I had begged my dad for a dog as long as I could remember.
When we got home mom and dad led me to the kitchen. I opened the door and there was Lady, about 5 pounds, excited and rambunctious, accompanied by a puddle of pee.
I was stunned, I couldn’t even stand, I immediately sat down on the stairs just to stabilize myself. She was so damn cute. I will never forget that moment.
10/18/2009 at 3:17 am
Hi Melissa- Great pix of Lady. I remember Lady as always being super friendly and excited, wagging her tail and wanting love from all who were willing to give it. She was in comm with me today and told me that she thought she had been a good dog for all the family. I told her that she had been. She decided that she was coming back as a dog again. I told her that was a great idea and she should waste no time finding a new doggie body. I hope she find a family as good as yours or maybe you guys can hook up again!
Love, Uncle Jake
10/18/2009 at 10:47 am
I’m so sorry about Lady, but so happy we all got to know her and love her for so long.
I’ll miss her cuddles and hugs the most. Whenever I saw her she would just want to chill and be loved. The dog really knew how to live.
And I’ll never forget how Jay loved to tell Lady, “sick ‘er!,” when I came over – but Lady would show that she was happy to see me, anyway.
10/18/2009 at 11:52 am
Hey everyone,
My favorite memories of lady were as follows
1. whenever i was in trouble she would protect me (i.e joe and mel torturing me) and only me, if i was messing with mel, lady would only help me.
2. The way she presented herself, as the alpha-female, the mom and protector, but also as the friend.
3. The way she could just live off of attention
4. How she always knew the right face for each person, each face of hers differed but all wound up with the same result, her with another dinner.
5. How if she peed on the carpet, and we found out, you could always tell how guilty she felt, when it was really our fault for forgetting to take her out.
6. No matter who it was, they could be the most sour person, Lady would always find a way to their hearts.
7. The way you could just lie down with her and watch her go to sleep, but she would only go to sleep if you closed your eyes too.
8. The way she was always there, and willing to spend some time with you.
9. The way she was like my other sister, the one that never asked for much in return, just some food, water, a walk, and of course her favorite thing, lots and lots of love
I love you Lady, there are so many good times we had together, many more then i have listed. Come visit us someday okay?
-Your friend and brother, Jay
10/18/2009 at 11:59 am
Let me start out by saying, I am not a dog lover. Before Lady, I had never ever gotten along with any dog. This dog was the sweetest, most caring dog I have ever come across. I have one particular memory of her that stands out. The whole Lefkowitz family was at Joe’s graduation, and Jay asked me to come over and let Lady out because they would be gone for the entire day. I let myself in the house with the “hidden” key, and of course, Lady was there to greet me by the door, starved for the attention that she had been missing all day. I thought it was going to be simple to get her to go outside, when Jay did it, she listened immediately. So I called her to go downstairs, but she wouldn’t budge. I tried pulling her, and then felt mean so I stopped. Feeling defeated, I sat on the floor, about to cry when she walked over and nudged me to pet her. I eventually dragged her outside on her leash, but that was besides the point.
She was a great dog and will be missed very much.
10/19/2009 at 1:29 am
Okay, now I’ll actually share one of my favorite memories with Little Lady. I remember just this month, I brought Lady for a walk. I decided to bring her to Hawthorne Park so she could run around. She was smiling the whole walk there and just happy to be in the outdoors. When we got to the field, I let her run around. The sun was bright and shining on her golden fur. She saw a puddle of mud and I told her not to go over to it. Of course, she went over and immediately plopped in the mud. I just let her have fun and she looked so cute rolling around, like a little piggy. She had the biggest smile on her face which made me happy. Then, I took a picture (the last one on this entry) and I will save it forever. RIP Lady, We all love and miss you.
10/19/2009 at 7:03 am
Hey Mel,
I am sorry I missed you both times yesterday. Please try again. I am even more sorry to hear about Lady. Your home and the earth will not be the same without her sweet, loving spirit. My favorite thing about Lady was the way in which she so dutifuly circulated energy around your house, moving from room to room, as if to check on each member of your family, and make sure y’all were secure in your places. I also liked how she would curl up on your bed whenever I slept over and it made me want to trade my 8,000 pet birds for just for of Lady’s kind. I love the pictures you posted in her honor and the swimming one is my favorite, of course. Lady of the Water…so beautiful! I know this must be extra hard being so far from home but you can honor her memory anywhere, which you obviously are quite good at. So much to love to you, your family, and Lady on her new journey. ~ Michelle
10/19/2009 at 10:27 am
Little Lady Lefkowitz
Always my little girl.
Always frisky and young
Always curious,protective
Loving and lazy
Cute
A brute with a rabbit in her mouth
Making me crazy with her shedding
And then with her bedding down with Harry on my side of the bed
Sometimes she’d win and sleep in the middle
Oh well
I know we all swell with the love of our lady
A love that costs an empty house
And now a mouse with nothing to challenge its presence
I loved you very much my little lady
Love Mom
10/19/2009 at 10:49 am
I’ve had many hilarious Lady moments, but my favorite tender moment happened back when Melissa and I were still in high school. I had been at the Lefkowitz’s house several times, but Lady and I hadn’t truly bonded. I was in Melissa’s room, and Melissa was somewhere else in the house. Lady came in and jumped on the bed, but instead of simply staking her claim on the bed, she came intent on snuggling with me. I pet her a bit, but when I stopped, she stayed with me, content to relax. When Melissa came back, she wagged her tail because she was excited to see Melissa, but she stayed, nuzzled, next to me. Lady was very much a person and could communicate what she needed or how she felt better than any dog I’ve come across. What a sweet pup.
10/19/2009 at 10:58 am
Thank you Mel for those wonderful pictures. They are perfect and represent lady at some of her best moments. Also thank you everyone for posting comments. I didn’t realize that all of you also had special moments with lady even if you weren’t part of our immediate family.
my favorite times with Lady were the the everyday experiences I had with her.Whenever I came home she would always wait for me at the front door when she heard the car pull up.If she was tired, she would just wag her tail against the floor when I came in. I walked her almost everyday of her life. She could be 2 flights down in the basement but when she heard the ruffling of the plasic bag I would bring with me, she would come running up. Then she would jump up and down at the door waiting in anticipation to go out for her walk. I still remember when we first saw Lady in her crate with the other puppies in her litter she jumped the highest and with the most enthusiasm. We just had to pick her. She loved to sniff when she walked and sometimes I lost patience with her, but when I learned that dogs can smell a scent from a block away, and sniffing is what they loved the most, I let her sniff all she wanted.
One of the most endearing things I remember about her is that when Mom was sick after her surgery or after her chemo, Lady would go up into her bedroom and lay down on the floor beside her bed to offer comfort and solace and to protect her. I thought that she was exhibiting a very hunan quality, and I viewed much differently after that.
And of course we all remember the playful moments wrestling on the floor or playing fetch.
We will always remember you Lady
Love,
Your Dad
10/20/2009 at 1:22 am
There are so many memories of Lady, I don’t even want to pick one. You could always find her in her usual spots, holding down the fort by barking at passing dogs and people. She was sweet, wanting some love (as well as some food) wherever she could find it. Im sorry she went so quickly, it feels very sudden, and I’ll miss the jingle of her leash around the house. RIP Lady.
10/20/2009 at 5:06 am
Heres a little something I came across there are pictures they just didn’t come up– For you Joe
A Dog Named Lady
By Joe Lefkowitz
There once was a little puppy who was born with six brothers and sisters in a big house.
That puppy lived with her mommy until she was old enough to want to live with her own family. So a family with a little girl who loved her decided to take her home.
The family was very nice to her and loved her very much. One week after the puppy moved into her new home, a little boy came home from camp. When he saw the new little puppy he was so happy he fell down.
The new family named the puppy “Lady” and they loved her with all their hearts. She was very happy with her family.
Every year on June 4th they gave her a birthday present, and she had a great time with whatever she got.
Now it is her birthday again, and this year she will get more than a bone. She gets a book written all about her and how much her family loves her.
The End
10/20/2009 at 12:24 pm
Hi, Melissa. Pretty pix of the Lady!
Thank you for having this available for all to “talk to”.
Funny, I deal with passing and passed over pets all the time as “Aunt Julie the Pet Communicator” but this time I AM a literal Aunt Julie for our Missie Lady-girl. I do not envy you, any of you, this time but see that you are all working your way through it as you can There is strength in the family dynamic and the caring and understanding borne of knowing each other so well and how to best comfort each other.
I was fortunate to have been able to comm with Lady, and I like that you are having folks talk about her and share their Pleasure Moments with you, themselves and HER – what a nice thing to do for her!
(YEAH, she knows.)
Having dealt with passing over and passed over pets before, I’ve read tributes and the like; what folks have written on yours is one of the most heartfelt, purest and sweetest collections of outpourings. NICE, and I know she feels appreciated in a very true sense. Hey – I love what the immediate family members wrote! (WOW) and can also tell that Lady touched a lot of others’ lives. A very special lady.
As you know, I’ve only had a few chats with our baby-girl; I think you will remember that first and foremost talk some years back when I was up there visiting… there were some special moments. She had a message specifically for you and I went downstairs to pass it along. UhHUH. (EM me if you’ve forgotten that one…)
My memories of her “in person” were her capacity to love and her tolerance level. These are traits of a Golden, yes, but also a *being*’s traits, that is, one’s either got it or they don’t. She did a good job, that one.
She was also good to my dog Fox Mulder and made him feel welcome and mishpucha. Love me, love my dog, I always say. Well, better put, if someone likes my doggie, they’re TOPS in my book. She had me at Hello-to-my-dog. Mwah!
And you may have heard of her comm the other day when Sharon mobilized the troops over at your house up there by the speaker phone and called me in case anyone wanted to have me check in with her? It seems pretty much everyone had had, and was having still, their own comm with her each in their own wise. Very cool to find out!
Lady did have a few things to volunteer and chime in about
Now, amongst other things that Lady felt good about, she felt that things for her were not frantic but rather were under control for her on the subject of “Melissa”. She had touched in with you during your “awake time that was also sleepy time” (your mom reminded me of the time difference to clarify *that* confusion LOL). She was very calm on the subject of you and actually was fine in retrospect that you had not been there in person at the time of the incident and afterwards, as her connection with you was (is) so strong, intact and easily established for her. Even if this feeling only exists at her end (I can understand your wishing that it could have been otherwise – who wouldn’t!?), SHE was fine on how it had occurred since, well, it did, and sometimes there’s just no way around that, so she wasn’t going to hang onto anything about that (typical wonderful Lady tolerance!) and she felt very bonded to you still, so she, at her end, did not have to experience an undue Loss Of Melissa. You were right there accessible to her and right there for her to comm to. She could tune right in to you! and this made her happy. So this was and is a big plus!
We humans perhaps might go, Hmmm…well, okaaaaay then – but you just have to really get that it was and IS a BIG DEAL to them. The pets. To her. To LADY. SHE felt good about things and her love for you helped her through emotionally this time. It was one of the stabilizing influences for her. You and others as well, but I’m just writing here primarily of her relationship with you as this is your blog.
I wanted you to know this. I also wanted you and folks who were not at that “meeting” to know that Lady made a *point* of saying that the guys who attended to her upon discovering her body laying there and as things unfolded right afterwards, treated her body with respect and she really appreciated that. Noticed it and appreciated it. It made her feel better about herself and her BEAUTY and WORTH. It was important to her that this was voiced for her, to those concerned, and important enough that I’m passing it along here as well.
Again, I don’t have memories of her along the lines of fun times she and I shared “in person”, as I do not live up there so was not so privileged to have been able to spend much time with “her” but the time I’ve spent with HER has been fulfilling. She’s a charming girl, a sweetie and very much a Good Dog and a true FAMILY MEMBER!Thank you again for this opportunity to tell you some of her comm and to be allowed to read the special things folks wrote who *did* get to spend such loving and quality time with her throughout her entire life!
Love to you from across the miles,
your auntie Julie
10/21/2009 at 10:41 am
The last time I saw Lady was mid-September on Rosh Hashana. Aliza, Harry, Susan and Lady and I were all outside socializing and Lady wanted to hang with me. In fact, every time I’d come over, which hasn’t been often especially since I live in Florida, Lady would let me know she wanted to be with me with her head nudging me all the time. She loved when I scratched her back and ears and gave her hugs and because I’d do it when I first came in the house, the rest of my visits she didn’t want to leave my side. I’ve always looked forward to seeing her when visiting my family and I will miss her loving and caring friendship. I feel this last time I saw her she was trying to tell me something and now I understand what that was.
Love,
Aunt Arlene
10/22/2009 at 12:53 am
I will always remember Lady. She was a great dog, but even more than being a dog, she was totally family and wanted to be a part of all activities. Definitely my most recent memory was what my mom (Arlene) said. But I remember all the times when I had been over and she was definitely “there” for us. She of course wanted all her rubs and don’t even think about stopping.
I remember her always hanging around the table when we were eating, or a couple times ago she sat up on the couch with me. She was absolutely adorable and will be missed briefly but remembered always. And I can’t wait to “see” you around.
ML,
Aliza
10/23/2009 at 10:12 pm
I’m sorry to hear about your loss of Lady. She was a great dog, and whenever I was over the Lefkowitz house, Lady was never alone. She was always playing with someone or snuggling up with another. She was very lucky to have been with such a loving family. My favorite memory of Lady was sometime during this past spring break, Mel and I took her out for a very late night walk around our neighborhood. She loved to sniff, and it was nice to see how calm Mel became while taking this walk with Lady because she had been very stressed from her thesis. Lady brought comfort and warmth to those around her, and she will be missed.